byrneunit

I rarely know what you’re talking about.

Pray for Mojo

Dear god help me, I’m worried about these debates.
More specifically, I’m in fucking knots about this election. At this point, the very real spectre of four more years of this fucking chimpanzee and his band of corporate zealots is looming large, and you know that line about things not really changing even if the guy [...]

Suck at 35,000 feet

God bless Netflix, and the fine work they do. I forget how I even heard about it, but a double-feature DVD of “Airport” and “Airport ‘75″ sure did make its way to the top of our Netflix queue recently, and yesterday afternoon/evening Darleece and I got the chance/had the free time/nothing good was on TV [...]

“Mystery.”

Today’s episode is tentatively titled, “Encyclopedia Brown and the Case of the Apparently Drunk Person That Vomited What Appears to be Andy Capp’s Hot Fries All Over Our Front Porch.”
Naturally, our first suspect was Jimmy Jam. Upon investigating Mr. Jam, we determined he had a fairly solid alibi, having spent last night with Danger Lady, [...]

Defeat looms

I’m concerned about The Thick Hearty Soup, my fantasy football team. They’re 1-1 in their division, but this week they’re playing The Cheat’s undefeated All-Talk All-Stars. Not to puff up the opponent too much, but they’re undefeated for a reason. (Apparently having the first-round draft pick can have a positive effect on your team. Shocked, [...]

So long, creepy old guy

Russ Meyer has shuffled off this mortal coil, no doubt to some weird old-guy fantasy land where 22-year-old white girls not wearing their 44HH brassieres serve him appletinis and do dances from “Laugh In.”
In honor of this uniquely American weird old guy, who built an empire and made a decent living from his obsession with [...]

Tickle Me St. Elmo

What, you might ask, could make the song “St. Elmo’s Fire (Man in Motion)(!)” any dumber? I mean, there’s the matter of the ridiculously inspirational lyrics, including frequent references to eagles. There’s the horn- and synth-heavy music track, which by itself is enough to kill an adult grizzly bear with its inherent retardedness.
Yet ultimately, we [...]

In a Blaze of Glory

Goddammit. My one-game winning streak ended tonight in ignonimous defeat at the hands of Max Power’s fantasy football team, “Grubby the Child of Small Fat Quality.*”
Eh. It was a good run. And on the plus side, I got a piece of spam today from somebody who claimed their name was “Puma S. Compliance.” So, y’know. [...]

WOO WOO!!!

I’m pretty stoked, as I’m working on booking an interview about this book:

Mainly I’m interested in the fact that (I hope) it’ll answer a question I’ve had for a long time about guys who are really into model trains. (The question, for the record, is “What’s the deal with guys who are really into model [...]

Check, braw.

God knows how many other people have linked to this already, but oh my god, you have got to click here. It’ll bring you to an explanation page; when you’re done reading it, click on the banner up top, which will bring you to the current page.
For the full effect, you should really start [...]

F/Sex

So after viewing one episode of “Nip/Tuck” and half an episode of “Rescue Me,” I’ve come up with a simple but concise formula:
FX Original Series = Lots of sex
Not for the viewer, necessarily, but the characters on the shows seem to get around pretty well. Basic cable is basic cable, of course, which means there’s [...]

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