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    • Archive for June, 2006

    Help a brothers out

    Monday, June 26th, 2006

    Two things for you today, both Super Mario Bros.-related. Part 1: In which a group of people with bright futures* do something truly inspired at a college talent show. And Part II: In which Jason Bateman and Alyssa Milano introduce a performance of “Super Mario Bros. on Ice,” starring, as King Koopa, one Christopher Hewett, [...]

    “Look, what am I supposed to do here?”

    Thursday, June 22nd, 2006

    There’s a woman in the neighborhood who’s always walking a pair of wiener dogs. Yesterday I saw one of them taking a wiener dog dump, and you know that look dogs get on their faces when they’re taking a dump in public? The one where it’s suddenly clear that they are acutely aware of the [...]

    Our dear old retarded step-cousin

    Tuesday, June 20th, 2006

    Leaving the city of one’s birth, youth, and young adulthood is bound to bring up some complex emotions. In my case those emotions are a mixture of nostalgia, relief, indifference, relief, and a sudden interest in the history of my hometown. Also there’s some relief in there. For all its faults, and for all its [...]

    More of the goodness.

    Friday, June 16th, 2006

    “Thank heavens,” you must be saying. “More frickin’ baby pictures!” Well I’ll have you know there’s more to us than that. Why, here’s a picture of our first trip to IKEA! … and the line at IKEA. Let me tell you something, it is really, really best to visit IKEA on a day that doesn’t [...]

    And he said “come see,” and I saw. And it was SoapNet.

    Friday, June 9th, 2006

    Friends. I’ve been in a bit of a quandary, or a conundrum, or some other such thing where you don’t know where your shit is at. To wit: While we need cable to survive, since otherwise we’ll have to fucking talk to each other and shit*, the only land-line cable service available in our area [...]

    … and I guess we just live here now, or something.

    Wednesday, June 7th, 2006

    So right. We moved to Chicago recently. Would you like to hear about it? Good. The drive was okay. I drove the truck, with Trucky riding shotgun, as one might expect, foreshadowing being what it is. I spent much of my sub-speed limit trek upward across the great Midwest thinking about how totally worth it [...]

    House!

    Tuesday, June 6th, 2006

    We’re on the ground floor. I swear to pete I’ll post an actual account of the move soon, especially since I am currently passed out in the bar car of the unemployment train, but man, right now I’m just so goddamn tired. Must be all that Polish sausage. Sheesh.

    I, bumpkin

    Saturday, June 3rd, 2006

    So, um, Chicago is kind of large. We’re fine. More soon.