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And he said “come see,” and I saw. And it was SoapNet.
By briantologist | June 9, 2006
Friends.
I’ve been in a bit of a quandary, or a conundrum, or some other such thing where you don’t know where your shit is at. To wit: While we need cable to survive, since otherwise we’ll have to fucking talk to each other and shit*, the only land-line cable service available in our area (Comcast) did NOT, and who fucking knows how something like this can happen in a universe some allege is ruled by a just god, did NOT offer SoapNet.
No SoapNet means no 90210, people. I don’t have to tell you how upsetting this is to certain members of our house. Okay, every member of our house. Except Trucky, who only watches the Speedway channel.
Oh, but wait! Turns out there’s not just one player in this little ballgame! I have just gotten off the phone with the OTHER landline cable provider* that serves our area (huhuh, serves our area), a joint calling itself RCN, and oh, Internets, listen to this:
It’s got SoapNet.
I just … I don’t have the words. I just don’t. So happy. So, so, happy.
Now if only I can find the fucking remote, we’ll be in business.
* — We were eating dinner last night, and we realized that with no TV to watch, we have significantly less to talk about. SCREW YOU FOR JUDGING US!!!!
** — Don’t talk to me about the Dish. I don’t wanna fuck with the Dish. Just don’t. No Dishes. Just no.
Topics: Fucking Awesome | 15 Comments »
June 9th, 2006 at 5:20 pm
Remember: He pulls a knife, you pull a gun; he sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue. That’s the Chicago way.
That has nothing to do with this post. I just want you to remember the Chicago way.
June 9th, 2006 at 5:48 pm
Comcast around here is fooey. I say go with the soapnet provider!
I think I’ll spend my rainy weekend (after only 30 or so days of almost continuous, flooding, biblical rain in Boston) … reading your archives! I started it yesterday. Work got in the way today. Tomorrow evening.. I know what my plans are! Hope you are all well. Henry is the cutest little one!
June 9th, 2006 at 5:52 pm
I know this is off topic but it must be put out into the ope. Did you read that Jason Lee is a Scientologist? Broke my heart. Love that Jason Lee. Trying not to be judgmental.
Happy for you in your new home. People in comments sound friendly. Is it really affordable there? I’m asking seriously. Boston is chewing me up.
June 9th, 2006 at 6:24 pm
The “SCREW YOU…” comment made me laugh SO VERY HARD.
God bless the television.
June 9th, 2006 at 6:35 pm
Lee’s Scientology breaks my heart too. ‘Cause I really, really like him otherwise. It’s like finding out your dad played backup guitar to Randy Jackson when he was in Journey.
I gotta tellya, from what I’ve heard about Boston, Chicago is pretty damned affordable by comparison. Our rent is more than it’d probably be in Tulsa, but bear in mind we’re also getting paid more than we were in Tulsa.
E is, anyway. I would be if I had a job.
June 9th, 2006 at 7:21 pm
We’ve got to make B watch some 90210 with us because then only thing better than watching 90210 is making someone who hates it watch it with you. Tickets to Chicago, I’m looking in your direction.
June 9th, 2006 at 7:57 pm
Comcast totally sucks around here. Spotty service, horrible customer service and all around crappiness. Go with the SoapNet provider. The soaps won’t steer you wrong.
June 10th, 2006 at 8:47 am
Comcast totally fucking broke my heart.
June 10th, 2006 at 10:30 am
Damn, RCN isn’t available here on the West Siiiiiiiide (West Town, anyway), and it’s all cheap and providing things like packages that are cheaper than those bastards at comcast. But the good thing? Chicago? More to do than in Tulsa to distract you from the teevee.
June 11th, 2006 at 12:21 pm
You could talk about Chicago and all the coolness that is there. Or just be shut-ins, like you did here.
June 12th, 2006 at 8:21 am
We’re shut-ins to the bone.
June 12th, 2006 at 8:49 am
So glad you have the option – we don’t down here so I suffer w/out SoapNet and WE and the style network. I’m crying.
June 12th, 2006 at 1:47 pm
Wait. You have a CHOICE about cable providers? Shit, comcast has a total wholesale monopoly where I live, and always has. Even when they were AT&T and before that when they were ADELPHIA. Fuck!
Monopolies ruin the world. I demand choices! That don’t involve the dish, obviously, because nobody wants to fuck with that fucking dish.
and yeah, if we didn’t have TV, I mean, WHAT ELSE IS THERE?
June 12th, 2006 at 2:35 pm
Dude! Is that James Belushi?
June 12th, 2006 at 9:09 pm
In in other news of television awesomeness, I’m watching “Mind Hunters” right now. It is every bit the gloriousness that you promised.